So the big issue we have with lots of the stuff about cock caging on tumblr and the internet is it’s really tied up with him being submissive. And yes sure there is an element of that in it, he is letting you put a cage on his cock lol but my hubby is definitely dominant, howver we have introduced this whole caging thing to spice up our sex life and wow it has really worked.
I guess I was worried about him not really being dominant when we first talked about it but I’ve come to understand that really we both like being ‘switchy’ with the power dynamic in sex kind of flowing where we want it to. The default has always been him being in charge and taking the lead, and I LOVE that, but adding the cage has given me the opportunity to take that sometimes and i like it much more than I thought I would.
So instead of chastity, which is what a lot of the blogs on here focus on and talk about, we tend to talk about orgasm denial’ The point of it for us isn’t making him submit to me (although we mess around with that) or to get him being more submissive (not a turn on), or gettign chores done around the house (although I take full advantage! lol) – the point is better more fun sex and new experiences together.
The main thing I have to do, when he’s caged, is keep him horny. If I just cage and ignore him he gets frustrated, in a bad way. It doesn’t take much, but in bed it’s cuddling, touching, and then making him do things to me. During the day it’s about little comments, touching him, either the cage through his trousers, or most of all his nipples, which give him an instant hard on
The main things that have worked with us having this include:
- Regularly tying his arms down – we use velcro straps so no worrying about my lack of knot skills – when you take his cage off, this is forced denial, his hands are either tied or the lock is closed… so he has no choice. I just like the idea that if either of those weren’t true he’d basically just throw me
- Making him lie on his hands – if they come out it stops
- Sitting on him and grinding against his cage, using a vibe on myself and then touching it to him to keep him stimulated
- Using a strap on dildo, yep, putting it ON him and making him fuck me – this is pretty hardcore but it can be amazing. It’s also bigger and longer than him and i make sure to tell him that as he fucks me. It seems to make him fuck me really, really hard… funny that.
- Using a strap on him – pegging… more in another post I guess.
But the big one is oral sex. on me. Honestly I wasn’t that into him going down on me (okay, I was wrong) for various reasons but it’s a huge theme in all the chastity captions so we started doing it more and it turned out hubby is amazing at it when I let him do it more. He’s also a fucking tease and keeps me right on the edge until I start going nuts, hoping I’ll promise to take the cage off. Sometimes I do! Most times I don’t, and he really gets off on being ‘made’ to do that.
Speaking of which with all the denying of him with the cage we are also denying me sometimes, so both enduring it together (again I’ll say more abotu that another time) – Search Tumblr or Google for Female Orgasm Denial for ideas on that!