Well sometimes we make games up, so we might set a target for him to reach or leave it to change with things like coin flip games.
Other times I just do it what I think is most fun! The advantage of the games or rules is actually I tend to be too easy on him if just left to my own devices, which is fine in the moment, but I’ll tend to make him cum or ruin him more than is hottest – which I think is probably once every couple of weeks for cumming, and maybe a ruin or two between that.
Having said that, I’m getting better at it all the time, and will leave him locked up because it turns me on now. Especially when I have him fuck me with the strap on, I love leaving him in the cage while ‘the cock he always wanted’ is the only thing he gets to use on me. So hot!
Other times we’re focusing on other factors like having games about making him ruin lots etc, so that all goes out the window.
The only real reward system we use is him getting edges or chances to cum related to me having orgasms. And no, I don’t punish him for bad behaviour. It’s not a female led relationship, I just love caging his cock up and us enjoying all the benefits of the intimacy and spice it brings to our sex life.