I saw a question on a forum today that asked:
Has anyone out there experienced changes or benefits to your life as a result of chastity?
Here’s a slightly edited version of my reply which I thought you might find interesting.
Let’s focus on the increased intimacy first, because that is what truly astounded us when we started this. We bought a cheap CB-6000 as a bit of fun when buying other toys, didn’t even try it for a week or two. He practised with it to get used to it for a few hours, and then when I put it on him that first time, honestly it still makes me feel all tingly. There was something so much more intimate in locking up his cock than I could ever imagine. Suddenly sex wasn’t all about getting to the point where that cock cums in or on me, it pretty much instantly rewrote the rulebook!
Anyway, back to the question, what have been the effects beyond that…
- we spend more time having sex than when we were first married let alone the last ten years. We’re physically intimate, maybe four or five times a week, and that’s not including quick edges. My friends didn’t believe me at first (and they still don’t know why). I actually have to talk about it less with them because it’s got to the point it pisses them off! (Part of the reason I set up my little Chastity WAGS thing to have others to chat to normally about it).
- we are both taking more care with our appearance, exercising more, eating better – the funniest fitness incentive for him is now he fucks me with a strap on or extender, he doesn’t have the ‘end point’ of cumming to let him stop! So we’re doing it for longer and longer (I’m starting to cum just from it now, which is AMAZING) – but he’s not fit enough to keep pounding away at me for as long as I need! So he’s now running, doing weights, so he can fuck my brains out with a huge strap on for long enough – can you even believe it
- we were pretty good at date nights etc but he’s more romantic again, I get more flowers, cards, etc – still more to do but it’s a great improvement
- he’s much more helpful around the house without me asking – I’m not into the demanding he does it all thing, but with him naturally being better, plus me being a bit bolder to ask, it’s a huge improvement
- I’m kinkier than ever – were were pretty kinky to start with, all his fault, got me into enjoying being submissive pretty early on – and we’ve always been relatively switchy, but he was where it all came from and I just went along with it (and loved it). But now I’m coming up with the ideas, I’m getting inspiration from tumblr and my Chastity WAGS (beware letting us get together lol) – I mean, I run a successful sex blog now, what the hell?!!!
- I’m not scared of his fantasies any more – I used to worry I couldn’t fulfil them, but with tease and denial and chastity, I’ve BECOME them! And the other stuff he tells me, and he tells me everything now, I love interrogating him as I edge him, so fucking hot, he can tell me anything and it’s not a threat. If I like it, great, if not I tell him that too and because he’s let it out, it’s no longer a big thing, and we can focus on the ones we both get off to.
- I’m really into porn – but it has to be good – I was always reluctant to watch it before, good Christian girl and all that, but again, because he’s so focused on me with the chastity I no longer see it as competition. Sure, sometimes all the perfect bodies are still a bit depressing, and we don’t watch it lots, but we do sometimes and we really enjoy it together. Also Tumblr’s been brilliant for that, just getting me more relaxed about it all and learning it’s okay to just pass over stuff I don’t like rather than seeing it as threatening or awful.
- I’m really, really into big cocks – this is the huge surprise (pun intended). I just wasn’t into other cocks much at all. I felt awkward looking at them in porn, I was totally focused on hubby’s and loved it and it was all I needed. And that was great. But now… oh god, he’s totally mind fucked me into loving looking at big cocks and I adore it now. I look at a big beautiful cock and my tummy gets butterflies and my pussy gets wet. And hubby LOVES IT. It’s really kind of hot that he’s done this to me, the main technique was just long, long cunnilingus sessions as I watched big cock compilation videos he’d found for me. I’m kind of into all that hypnosis, mind games stuff so the idea he’s turned me onto that is super hot. Let me be clear, I’m not into other men, just the cocks. We’re still strictly monogamous. But thanks to our King Cock strap on, I have the perfect huge cock whenever I want it. Happy, happy days!
- I’m way more into anal – but I don’t let him have it! This is kind of fucked up but funny. I used to do anal mostly because he wanted it, and it gave me a submissive thrill to give it to him. It felt okay, never great, but I loved how excited it got him. But now he’s caged, I’m WAY more into the idea! I love the idea of his cock being the perfect size for my bottom – it’s a turn on now. And he’s sees that. But I also get an evil thrill of NOT letting him fuck me there! I tease him mercilessly – ‘god honey I wish you could fuck my ass right now, too bad you’re in a cage’. I promise him my ass for special occasions, tell him how he can cum deep in it – and then find excuses to not let him! And best of all, I get him to lick it instead of fuck it while I get off!
- He’s become an oral Sex god! – he used to go down on me, sure, but it was only ever part of foreplay, he didn’t stay down there too long, and honestly, I always felt a it uncomfortable letting him do it! But now, oh my fucking god, he’ll suck and lick me to nirvana whenever I want (I still don’t demand it enough but I’m getting better) – and he LOVES it. He has got SO good at it (make him read this if he isn’t amazing yet:
https://female-orgasm-denial.tumblr.com/post/157590444398/how-to-give-cunnilingus-like-a-superstar) – he’ll make me cum again and again from it, or even better keep me on the edge for ages until I’ve lost my mind and then finally make me cum, or fuck me to orgasm with the strap on. Just, wow. I mean he’ll spend up to an hour between my legs when he’s caged – that’ll drop to 10-15 minutes if he’s not, it’s like magic (that’s still three times what I used to get).
- I’m excited about the future of our sex life – so many of my friends bemoan the continuing death throes of their sex life, while all we are is excited about where it’s going. I can see this kink sustaining our sex life for decades! It’s perfect as you get older too, as many here demonstrate.
So there you go, interesting to reflect on it all. I bet there’s more but I need to get stuff done! lol But wow, isn’t this the best kink ever!