Teasing Outside The Bedroom
The bedroom is not the only place where I tease my beloved husband. In fact, teasing outside the bedroom is a huge and essential part of our play.
I’ll start, though, with things we don’t do:
- We’re both adults, we deeply respect each other, and (in marriage) we’re on the same team. So I would never do anything to humiliate him in public. That hurts both of us, imho. That includes never telling my girlfriends that I control and deny him. I tell them he’s a stud… which he fucking is. That’s all they need to know.
- I’m also not into the cuckold fantasies you see online, so I never use other men to tease him. I actually think it’s hotter for him to know, without a doubt, that I expect him, and only him, to provide ALL of my pleasure and satisfaction, forever. My happiness is his lifelong challenge – I consider it part of his wedding vow. Conversely, my vow is that I will always and only use him for my fulfillment. He is my rock. I don’t need any other rocks.
But hey, if you’re into public humiliation or cuckold fantasies, there are plenty of blogs out there for you. Do your thing, and have fun with it!
Now here’s a list of some of my favorite tricks for teasing my husband outside the bedroom:
- My favorite, simple, oldie-but-goldie trick is to just grab his crotch through his pants, hold on, and rub a little – just enough to trigger his memory of what my hands can do. With firm eye contact, I do this discreetly (duh!) both in private and in crowds. In a crowd, it becomes a minor predicament for him, because it forces him to make some “adjustments,” which I get a kick out of. (note how that’s different, though, from openly humiliating him)
- Suck his finger(s), with steady eye contact. So simple. So effective! I just take his hand, form a pointing finger from his fist, and slide it slowly into my mouth. The innuendo is obvious. His reaction is adorable, every time.
- Dressing up / dressing down. My husband has a “thing” for yoga pants, yoga shorts, tennis skirts, high socks, and sports bras – basically, fitness clothes. Every guy on Earth has his “thing.” Know your guy’s thing. Use it!
- Text messages! This is huge. Like most normal people, I sometimes have more courage in writing than I do when speaking. Also like normal people, my husband and I spend most of the day apart, working normal jobs. This makes sexy texting a priceless part of tease-play. When do I text? Simple: after a night of edging, I always sext him the next day to keep his heat up. Always! Even if it’s a weekend and he’s sitting right next to me – I still make sure to sext him at least once. What do I say? Most of my sexts fall into four simple categories: 1) encouragement and positive reinforcement, like “Great job last night, baby!”; 2) hints of future teasing, like “Round three tonight. Be ready!”; 3) playfully dangling a prize beyond his reach, like “Wow I’m so wet right now… Too bad you’re at work!”; or 4) a cryptic string of suggestive emojis for his imagination to decipher. Personally, I’m not big into roleplaying via text (like “I slip the cuffs around your ankles, and then I…”) but I know many people are – so, that’s an idea, too.
- Whip it out. Technically it’s “outside the bedroom,” but I’m not sure if this counts. Anyway, in private, I tell him to sit still, then I just reach over, unfasten his pants, whip it out, and play a little. I might do this in the car, while we sit in a fast-food drive thru. Or on the couch, during football. Or as a reward for watching a chick-flick with me. The “play” can be very simple – I like to hold him tight and squeeze rhythmically (no strokes, just squeezes, so my arm doesn’t get tired) which, if I do it long enough, builds an edge so incredibly sloooow that it’s brainlessly easy for me to control and maintain it, once he’s close. One time, on an airplane, I covered his lap with a blanket and did exactly that to him for the entire flight! (the Denial-High Club? Okay… bad pun, sorry!) While he was sweating and clenching his armrests, I could still enjoy my magazine with my free hand, and I nonchalantly asked for his opinion on some articles and made him sniff the fold-out perfume pages, like no big deal. It was super fun for both of us – he still talks about it!
- Make him collect mysterious props. I looove this trick! It’s as simple as saying (or texting), “Hey, while you’re at the store, get some Gatorade and a bag of ice for tonight. Thanks!” It can literally be any random shit. “Hey, can you get my tennis racket from the car?… Yeah, leave it by the bed. Thanks baby!” Sometimes I have a real plan for the items. Sometimes I don’t. Either way, let his imagination do the teasing.
- Lip-reading or sign language. In the middle of a party or dinner with friends, you can silently mouth or signal something simple, clear, and sexy from across the room or across the table, just to tease him. “Fuck” is dead easy to lip-read, and (as far as I know) an informal hand-sign for sex looks like two scissors, lying flat, doing missionary. So a real-world example I discreetly mouthed to my husband at a dinner was: “I. (point at myself) Will. Fuck. (flat scissor) You. (point at him) Hard. (fist, wink)” He loved it!
- Tumblr. Yup! This place is loaded with sexy pictures, gifs, captions, and great ideas in writing – making it an obvious tool for teasing. You can forward or copy stuff to his phone or his email, just to keep up his heat. Or you can make it more interactive. Send him three hot gifs of men pleasuring women in three different ways, plus the simple-yet-ominous command “Pick one.” Or tell him to send three to you, for you to pick one. Or send him on a kinky scavenger hunt. (”Hold my vibe against your cock, on full power, and find me 5 gifs of men being ruined and 5 gifs of women climaxing. Don’t cum. They must be gifs I’ve never seen before. You can stop the vibe when I reply to your email, but I won’t reply if the gifs aren’t good enough.”) Get creative!
Those are just a few ideas. There are endless other possibilities, limited only by your imagination! If any readers have more ideas or personal stories of teasing outside the bedroom, please reply and share!
And always remember to have fun!
THIS IS BRILLIANT!
Best post I’ve read in ages, thank you!!!