Male Chastity · Orgasm denial

I saw your post and agree with so many of the effects you describe, although we’re only just starting out! One I’ve struggled with though, is porn, specifically lesbian scenes are a turn off (but so common!) – any advice or thoughts? Thanks! Sarah

Hi Sarah,

Good question!

Girl on girl sex in porn is so common that if you enjoy watching any together sometimes (and personally I love that if it’s good) it’d not be a bad thing to at least work on it not being a turn off.

I think it’s partly just getting used to it. When I first tried out tumblr so much of the stuff I saw freaked me out. Now sometimes I unsubscribed from those feeds, but mostly I’ve just learnt to skip over the posts and not worry about it. So at the very least if you can get to that point with lesbian bits in porn it’d make things easier.

But you can probably go a step further if you want to be a bit more proactive.

Here’s a fun thing you can do to at least help you appreciate other women being sexy – plus you can blow hubby’s mind. It’s SO fun.

You can ask him to find you a really sexy lesbian video. Try x-art or metart as a good starting point (their short videos are on pornhub and the like).

Then simply watch it on a tablet or tv or laptop, as he goes down on you. Just keep watching as you get more and more horny and see how it affects you. Start flicking from video to video, find women you think are beautiful, try to appreciate them, not see them as a threat. Try and see it through his eyes too.

If it doesn’t work, not a problem but it’d be hot for him to even try it. If it works at all, do it a few times and I bet you’ll feel much more relaxed about it all.

The ‘I’d do her’ goal

For me, where you want to get to is the place where you feel comfortable enough to joke, or say ‘I’d do her’ to hubby when you see a sexy woman.

Honestly,  I don’t know of much that turns hubby on more than me looking at an attractive woman and implying that! Every time he just looks at me with the ‘You’re the best wife ever’ gaze lol

The other positive outcome as I’ve done this kind of thing is I don’t tend to see other women as a threat, it’s not ‘I wish I had tits like that’ as much as ‘wow, those are gorgeous breasts’. It’s really shifted my insecurities about it.

It really adds to exploring fantasies with hubby too. The thought of him caged having to watch me with a woman is firstly much hotter to both of us than it being with a man (except for gloryholes, but moving on…) but also it opens up what is a classic cliched fantasy, a threesome – it’s a classic for a reason. It’s a fantasy for almost all guys. 

And it works amazingly with chastity, the idea of showing another woman his caged cock, teasing him about it together, for example. Endless possibilities.

Or another of our favourites, taking in or teaching some innocent but horny younger woman. The au pair or live in student. Hubby is caged to keep him behaved, but I secretly tell them to make it as difficult as they can for him, lol

So I think to sum up, see if you can at least get a bit more desensitised to it so it’s not interrupting your play together, and if possible see it as a challenge to get to the point where you can positively see other women as attractive and use it to turn hubby on as a shared sexy fantasy. It really helps with getting over your own insecurities, or at least I’ve found that.

Jane xxx

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